Hack bike journalists -You know, guys who stay at one magazine way too long, stop riding their bikes, and start faking it. Every magazine has at least one...I say no more

Hacky-Sack -The most godawful hippie invention of all time, frequently seen at bike festivals and Phish concerts. True fans call it a "foot bag."

Half-Track - a trail so narrow and/or overgrown that you'd hesitate even to call it singletrack.

Hamburger - the condition of skin, post auger, when geological contact was made with sharp rocks such as on a shale skree slope.

Hammer - to ride fast and hard. Someone who hammers.

Hanging in - barely maintaining contact at the back of the pack. Headset - the parts at the top and bottom of the frame's head tube, into which the handlebar stem and fork are fitted.

Hardtail - any bike with front suspension but no rear suspension. Contrast with rigid and F/S.

Heavy -: Every time technology gets bikes down to 22 or 23 pounds - the sweet spot for weight - some new innovation pushes it back up. In the steel era, it was front suspension. In the aluminum era, it was dual suspension. In the dual suspension era, it's disc brakes and heavy upright handlebars.

Hiker Log - an obstacle (e.g. a log or boulder) placed in trail by biker-hostile trail users.

Hill climb - an event contested from bottom to top of a significant vertical challenge, on road or off. Fastest rider to the top wins.

Hoffman, Matt -: The most injured man in the history of bike riding. Hoffman is a BMX superstar, and invented or perfected nearly every trick known to the two-wheeled world. Why is he on this list? Because nearly every downhiller under the age of 25 should acknowledge Hoffman's phenomenal influence on their technique and choice of a profession.

HOHA - Hateful Old Hikers Association. "HOHA members hate mountain bicyclists with a fervor exceeding that of rabid wolverines."

Honk - to vomit due to cycling exertion.

Honking - standing while climbing. Hybrid - a cross between a road bike and a mountain bike. Not as fast or efficient on pavement as the former, and not as well suited to singletrack as the latter. Also called a "cross" bike.

Horizontal Track Stand - a foot fault that happens at a stop sign.